A Different Sort of Christmas

I'm sitting here, the day after Christmas, contemplating my own mortality. Kinda weird, I know; but it's been a heck of a week, with no signs of letting up anytime soon.

Last Tuesday, or so, my son informed me that an aquaintance of mine - the mother of a friend of his, since elementary school - was diagnosed with breast cancer and was scheduled for surgery one day last week. Shocking piece of news.

Christmas Eve, I received a Christmas 'update' letter from a friend of mine. We haven't really socialized in the last several years, but did so for a number of years back in the late '80's, until the mid '90s. Our sons are 12 days apart. In recent years, we've mainly keep in touch at Christmastime. She underwent a double mastectomy in late 2004 and finished up chemotherapy in April of this year. She also had a total hip replacement a few months back. This news just gripped my heart. I told myself I must call her this week.

Last Friday night I spent from 11:00pm until 5:00am Christmas Eve morning in the ER with my husband. He SWORE the tube that is inserted in his spinal column came out and that he was leaking spinal fluid. He was 100% freaked out, and he thought he was going to die. He began to experience a horrid headache and dizziness at about 10:30pm - these are symptoms of spinal fluid leakage. Turns out the tube is inserted a good 7 to 8 inches into the spinal column and cannot pop out. According to the doctor, he may have experienced some leakage, but laying flat, he could have ridden it out at home. Who knew? He's fine now, but Christmas day at his sister's pretty much wore him out.

Then of course, there was Hector's daughter. That has been a heart-wrenching ordeal. Thankfully, she is on the mend.

Which brings me to today. I spent from 11:00am til 6:30pm with my mother in the hospital ER. She was finally admitted inpatient. For the past couple of weeks, she's experienced horrendous pain in her sternum, and the pain radiated to her back. Well, it would kind of come and go. She did go to the doctor on Friday, and was to undergo a sonogram sometime this week, but she just couldn't bear it any longer. She does have a gall stone. And my brother just called from the hospital with the news that she'll have surgery tomorrow to have her gall bladder removed.

But the worrisome part is that her blood work shows her to be severely anemic, which highly concerns the doctor. And her chest x-ray revealed a little something on her right lower lung. The results from a CAT scan will determine an exact diagnosis, but we won't know that until tomorrow, I guess.

My brother stole me away from mom for a few minutes to inform me that he took himself to the ER last Thursday. He was experiencing chest pain. After all blood work and tests were completed, it was determined that he did not have a heart attack. Thank God. But, ever the cautious ER docs, he was told to follow up with a cardiologist. He's scheduled for a stress test.

I'm totally spent. I'm also emotionally numb. I can't write too much about my mother, though, because I think that would cause me to burst into tears. Let's just say I still need my mama. I've already lost my dad and my stepdad. I can't do this again. Not now.